Turning Archive 2005

Re: Can I blame Bill Grumbine?

>Piece of cake. Blame your wife. If she were home to ride herd on you, this wouldn't be a problem. The choice, by the way, between turning wood and turning commodes is rather easy when she isn't there standing over your shoulder.

If you would allow a prediction, I go through this from time to time when my wife takes the little one and goes to visit friends where we used to live.

The first night, you will do nothing but revel in the quiet house until about 11pm, when you wander over to the lathe and break the silence. You won't do much this night before turning in.

The following day, you will spend every available waking second spinning wood in complete luxury, with the knowledge that you are safe from chores and interruptions - although you will keep the phone two inches away from the power switch on the lathe.

On the last night, you will have dinner, relax in your easy chair for a few minutes, and then wake up at 11pm because you didn't get much sleep the night before. Over the course of the next hour you will talk yourself into working on the toilet, knowing what you will face if it isn't completed by the time they are home. Tools will be gathered, and you will tear it all apart and make great progress in shorter time than you thought it would take, and you will mildly berate yourself not to procrastinate next time because look how easy it is and how fun it turned out to be, right up until you either break a part or realize you are missing a part at about 2:30am. The next thirty minutes will not be good as you concoct the manner in which you will spin your heroic story of speed and progress on the commode until the unthinkable happened that stopped you in your tracks (broken/missing tool or part). You'll go to bed at about 3am, and fake your way through the next day running on fumes.

BUT - you'll have a heck of a nice looking bowl to show for it!!!!

AND - she'll know exactly what happened, it will annoy her a bit, but she fully expected it to happen this way when she told you she was taking the trip.

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